30 second Speech by Bryan Dyson (CEO of Coca Cola)
**************************************************
" Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them - Work, Family, Health, Friends and Spirit and you're keeping all of these in the Air.
You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back.
But the other four Balls - Family, Health, Friends and Spirit - are made of glass.
If you drop one of these; they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged or even shattered. They will never be the same. You must understand that and strive for it."
WORK EFFICIENTLY DURING OFFICE HOURS AND LEAVE ON TIME. GIVE THE REQUIRED TIME TO YOUR FAMILY, FRIENDS & HAVE PROPER REST.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
先上车，后补票
除了年轻男女，我们的政府高官也喜欢“先上车后补票”的玩意儿。
按照正常智商的行事模式，任何决策在被执行前，必先经过咨询、钻研、商讨以及完善化的步骤，以尽量减低出错的几率及执行的成本。
然而，凡事都有例外。尤其是在国情不同的马来西亚。我们政府大楼冷气房内的决策者，习惯将上述的顺序调转来进行。
或许是想在沉闷的生活里给老百姓制造一些惊喜的涟漪，政府通常会在大家没有心理准备的情况下公布一些石破天惊的政策或决定。更刺激的是，没有人会告诉你执行的详情。事实上，连决策者本身也不太清楚详情。
经典例子，看看早前的大马卡添油配额计划。公告天下之后，却没有人知道该怎么执行。后来官爷们终于睁开双眼发现了技术盲点而悬崖勒马。喊停不是问题；问题是，政府部门一贯地偏偏选在这个节骨眼上展现超越先进国的行政效率，早已花费7000万令吉购入一批大马卡解读器。这批解读器，现在可以送到308大选前选委会以400万令吉购入、后来又临时决定不用的不褪色墨汁一起收藏了。可是，这笔帐该算到谁的头上？
另一种情况，是政府会因为一、两个人的心血来潮而剑及履及，一想到就马上要实行，容不下多一分钟的思考及反馈。2003年推行的英文教数理政策，让我们见识到政府在这方面的魄力。不顾一切反对的声浪及不同的意见，强制推行6年后，才发现原来课程准备不足、师资培训不够、学生应付不来。6年光阴，就这样莫名其妙成为了某人为一刹那的灵感而进行试验的土囊。
还有一种百份百符合本土风味的，是斩钉截铁要实行某项据说惠及全民的政策，敲锣打鼓热烈推销、张灯结彩万事俱备之后，临出闸前却突然紧急刹车！本来打算在本季国会提呈二读、被第二财政部长形容为“有利于国家及全民” 的消费税法案，日前在国会召开前却临时喊停，原因是“政府需要更多时间与人民沟通”。已经提呈到国会一读之后，现在才突然想起要“收集人民的意见”？“准备好了”是他讲的；“还未准备好”也是他讲的，政府独有的思考逻辑与行事顺序，比浮云还难捉摸。
对于垃圾的处理，政府教育我们想好好才丢。对于重大决策，政府的处理方式却比丢垃圾还要随便。
先上车后补票，可是却经常因为补不到票而狼狈地被赶下车，那为什么不买好票才上车？我也不清楚，毕竟我和你一样，是智商正常的一群。
按照正常智商的行事模式，任何决策在被执行前，必先经过咨询、钻研、商讨以及完善化的步骤，以尽量减低出错的几率及执行的成本。
然而，凡事都有例外。尤其是在国情不同的马来西亚。我们政府大楼冷气房内的决策者，习惯将上述的顺序调转来进行。
或许是想在沉闷的生活里给老百姓制造一些惊喜的涟漪，政府通常会在大家没有心理准备的情况下公布一些石破天惊的政策或决定。更刺激的是，没有人会告诉你执行的详情。事实上，连决策者本身也不太清楚详情。
经典例子，看看早前的大马卡添油配额计划。公告天下之后，却没有人知道该怎么执行。后来官爷们终于睁开双眼发现了技术盲点而悬崖勒马。喊停不是问题；问题是，政府部门一贯地偏偏选在这个节骨眼上展现超越先进国的行政效率，早已花费7000万令吉购入一批大马卡解读器。这批解读器，现在可以送到308大选前选委会以400万令吉购入、后来又临时决定不用的不褪色墨汁一起收藏了。可是，这笔帐该算到谁的头上？
另一种情况，是政府会因为一、两个人的心血来潮而剑及履及，一想到就马上要实行，容不下多一分钟的思考及反馈。2003年推行的英文教数理政策，让我们见识到政府在这方面的魄力。不顾一切反对的声浪及不同的意见，强制推行6年后，才发现原来课程准备不足、师资培训不够、学生应付不来。6年光阴，就这样莫名其妙成为了某人为一刹那的灵感而进行试验的土囊。
还有一种百份百符合本土风味的，是斩钉截铁要实行某项据说惠及全民的政策，敲锣打鼓热烈推销、张灯结彩万事俱备之后，临出闸前却突然紧急刹车！本来打算在本季国会提呈二读、被第二财政部长形容为“有利于国家及全民” 的消费税法案，日前在国会召开前却临时喊停，原因是“政府需要更多时间与人民沟通”。已经提呈到国会一读之后，现在才突然想起要“收集人民的意见”？“准备好了”是他讲的；“还未准备好”也是他讲的，政府独有的思考逻辑与行事顺序，比浮云还难捉摸。
对于垃圾的处理，政府教育我们想好好才丢。对于重大决策，政府的处理方式却比丢垃圾还要随便。
先上车后补票，可是却经常因为补不到票而狼狈地被赶下车，那为什么不买好票才上车？我也不清楚，毕竟我和你一样，是智商正常的一群。
Cancer-fighting properties of papaya cited in tests
MIAMI (AFP) - Researchers said Tuesday that papaya leaf extract and its tea have dramatic cancer fighting properties against a broad range of tumors, backing a belief held in a number of folk traditions.
University of Florida researcher Nam Dang and colleagues in Japan, in a report published in the Journal of Ethnopharmacology, documented papaya's anti-cancer effect against tumors of the cervix, breast, liver, lung, and pancreas.
The researchers used an extract made from dried papaya leaves, and the effects were stronger when cells received larger doses of papaya leaf tea.
Dang and the other scientists showed that papaya leaf extract boosts the production of key signaling molecules called Th1-type cytokines, which help regulate the immune system.
This could lead to therapeutic treatments that use the immune system to fight cancers, they said in the February issue of the journal and released Tuesday by the university.
Papaya has been used as a folk remedy for a variety of ailments in many parts of the world, especially Asia.
Deng said the results are consistent with reports from indigenous populations in Australia and his native Vietnam.
The researchers said papaya extract did not have any toxic effects on normal cells, avoiding a common side effect of many cancer treatments.
Researchers exposed 10 different types of cancer cell cultures to four strengths of papaya leaf extract and measured the effect after 24 hours. Papaya slowed the growth of tumors in all the cultures.
Dang and a colleague have applied to patent the process to distill the papaya extract through the University of Tokyo.
University of Florida researcher Nam Dang and colleagues in Japan, in a report published in the Journal of Ethnopharmacology, documented papaya's anti-cancer effect against tumors of the cervix, breast, liver, lung, and pancreas.
The researchers used an extract made from dried papaya leaves, and the effects were stronger when cells received larger doses of papaya leaf tea.
Dang and the other scientists showed that papaya leaf extract boosts the production of key signaling molecules called Th1-type cytokines, which help regulate the immune system.
This could lead to therapeutic treatments that use the immune system to fight cancers, they said in the February issue of the journal and released Tuesday by the university.
Papaya has been used as a folk remedy for a variety of ailments in many parts of the world, especially Asia.
Deng said the results are consistent with reports from indigenous populations in Australia and his native Vietnam.
The researchers said papaya extract did not have any toxic effects on normal cells, avoiding a common side effect of many cancer treatments.
Researchers exposed 10 different types of cancer cell cultures to four strengths of papaya leaf extract and measured the effect after 24 hours. Papaya slowed the growth of tumors in all the cultures.
Dang and a colleague have applied to patent the process to distill the papaya extract through the University of Tokyo.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
夢醒時分 The moment when dream is awakend...
鄭丁賢•夢醒時分
2009-12-02 20:49b
你是否和我一樣，發覺身邊的親戚和朋友，似乎少了許多。
I wonder you feel the same as me, all the sudden I realized
friends and relatives around me seems to get less and less.
以往接近過年時，各種聚餐排得滿滿的，而今年，似乎沒聲沒息。
Those years when the New Year drew near, all sorts of gathering
appointments almost completely filled the diaries, but this year
seems so quiet.
即使是平常日子，電話少了，與大家見面也少了。
Even in nromal time, phone calls become less and less, face to
face meet up also become much less.
也許，大家各忙各的；或者，目前流行“宅生活”，儘量避免出門。
Perhaps, everybody is busy with their own tihings, or perhaps,
nowadays people prefer to stay in.
也不盡然如此。再想一想，很多老友和親戚，已經不在了。嗟！大吉利是，他們都還好好的，只是離開了馬來西亞。
However, it is not entirely like this, thinking further, actually old
friends and relatives are not around any more. God bless, they
are still alive and well, they just left the country, Malaysia .
去了中國大陸開工廠；王子不做工程師，移民到澳洲開小食檔；阿風離開本地大學，去香港做講師；青蛙去了台灣，開展事業第二春；還有的到了美國、英國，唔，還有去印尼的……。
They have gone to China to set factory; ah Wang quit his
engineer job and migrated to Australia to set up his little food
store business, ah Fong left the local University went to Hong
Kong as a lecturer. 'Frog' went to Taiwan to pursue his second
career life. Others went to Americia , England , even Indonesia ...
起初，以為這只是個別現象，逐漸的，旁人也有同樣發現；原來，這不是個別現象，而是社會現象；這不是少數，而是相當大的數目。
At first, I thought these are individual cases, but gradually,
people around me realized the same, these are not individual
cases but a general symptoms of our society. they are not small
numbers but the pretty big indeed.
外交部早前披露了一個數字，說明這個現象是多麼真實，多麼貼近。
Department of Foreign Affairs released the figures earlier, it
confirmed the situation is real.
從去年3月到今年9月，已經有30萬大馬人移民他國；其中20萬人是今年1月到8月出走的數目。
From March 2008 thru September 2009, a total of 300,000
Malaysian migrated to other countries, among them 200,000 left
between Jan - Aug 2009. (in 8 months)
積下來，已經有超過200萬大馬人移民，接近今天印尼外勞在大馬的人口。
Cummulatively, there are 2 million Malaysian migrated, this
figure is close to the number of Indonesian workers in Malaysia
today.
不同的是，移居他國的大馬人，多是專業人士、中產階級。
The difference are, those migrated are mostly professional and
middle class people.
他們有很多出走的理由，追求事業發展，為了孩子前途，尋找個人更大空間……，概括一句：對馬來西亞失望。
They have many reasons to leave: pursue career development, for
the future of their children, in search of better life and
environment... In one sentence, they lost hope of Malaysia .
50年前，大家說，馬來西亞真好，好過香港，甚至日本。
50 years ago people said: Malaysia is very good, better than
Hong Kong and even Japan .
30年前，大家說，馬來西亞還不錯，比得上韓國、台灣（不提香港和日本了）。
30 years ago people said: Malaysia is not bad, comparable to S.
Korea and Taiwan . (No mention of Hong Kong and Japan any more).
20年前，大家說，馬來西亞還可以，至少超越中國、泰國（不能和台、韓比了）。
20 years ago people said: Malaysia can do la, at least better
than China and Thailand (Cannot compare with Taiwan and Korea lah)
10年前，大家說，馬來西亞再差，還不至於像越南、印尼（中國已是不同級別）。
10 years ago poeple said: No matter how bad Malaysia is, cannot
be worse than Vietnam and Indonesia ko-ah. ( China is already in
a different category).
今日，越南和印尼的經濟成長率遙遙領先大馬，社會活力和知識發展也勝過一籌；距離愈來愈近了。
Today, the economic growth rate of Vietnam and Indonesia already
far exceeded Malaysia , Social activity and intellectual
development of the country is also better, the gap between us
and them is closing up.
怕甚麼，還有菲律賓和柬埔寨、緬甸。
Why worry? there are still Philipines , Cambodia and Myanmar
behind us.
但是，一位經濟學家最近到菲律賓考察之後，認為再過20年，大馬可以取代菲律賓，出口馬籍女傭到全世界了。
However, according to an economist who recently surveyed
Phillipines, he think in 20 years' time, Malaysia can replace
Phillipines to become the World exporter of Malaysian maids.
半個世紀以來，馬來西亞是在大宅院裡，用封建方式，分配祖宗家業，消耗社會資源，浪費和逼走人才；不談競爭力，忽略生產力，討厭績效制。
Over half the century, Malaysians live in the big old imperial
housing complex, closed up and survive on properties left behind
by the ancestor; continue to consume up social resources,
wasteful, and drive away talents; they never talk about
competitiveness, totally neglect productivity, and hate meritocracy.
亞洲金融風暴來襲時，大馬把門關起來，以為避過一劫，有人還自我陶醉，自以為是天才策略。
When Asia economic storm hit in 1997, Malaysia closed their
doors, thinking we beautifully avoided a disaster, there even
think of themselves as genius, being able to handle the
situation so well.
然而，其它國家面對風暴，走出風暴，進行體質改革，跨步向前，登上另一個水平；大馬卻還在原地踏步。
However, just look at other countries in our neighbourhood, they
stand up, face the storm, and walk out of the storm. They
overhaul the system, improve the processes and march forward,
they moved up to a new level. And Malaysia , still walking on the spot.
馬來西亞，該醒一醒了。
Dear Malaysia , it's time to wake up! We are very very late now!
2009-12-02 20:49b
你是否和我一樣，發覺身邊的親戚和朋友，似乎少了許多。
I wonder you feel the same as me, all the sudden I realized
friends and relatives around me seems to get less and less.
以往接近過年時，各種聚餐排得滿滿的，而今年，似乎沒聲沒息。
Those years when the New Year drew near, all sorts of gathering
appointments almost completely filled the diaries, but this year
seems so quiet.
即使是平常日子，電話少了，與大家見面也少了。
Even in nromal time, phone calls become less and less, face to
face meet up also become much less.
也許，大家各忙各的；或者，目前流行“宅生活”，儘量避免出門。
Perhaps, everybody is busy with their own tihings, or perhaps,
nowadays people prefer to stay in.
也不盡然如此。再想一想，很多老友和親戚，已經不在了。嗟！大吉利是，他們都還好好的，只是離開了馬來西亞。
However, it is not entirely like this, thinking further, actually old
friends and relatives are not around any more. God bless, they
are still alive and well, they just left the country, Malaysia .
去了中國大陸開工廠；王子不做工程師，移民到澳洲開小食檔；阿風離開本地大學，去香港做講師；青蛙去了台灣，開展事業第二春；還有的到了美國、英國，唔，還有去印尼的……。
They have gone to China to set factory; ah Wang quit his
engineer job and migrated to Australia to set up his little food
store business, ah Fong left the local University went to Hong
Kong as a lecturer. 'Frog' went to Taiwan to pursue his second
career life. Others went to Americia , England , even Indonesia ...
起初，以為這只是個別現象，逐漸的，旁人也有同樣發現；原來，這不是個別現象，而是社會現象；這不是少數，而是相當大的數目。
At first, I thought these are individual cases, but gradually,
people around me realized the same, these are not individual
cases but a general symptoms of our society. they are not small
numbers but the pretty big indeed.
外交部早前披露了一個數字，說明這個現象是多麼真實，多麼貼近。
Department of Foreign Affairs released the figures earlier, it
confirmed the situation is real.
從去年3月到今年9月，已經有30萬大馬人移民他國；其中20萬人是今年1月到8月出走的數目。
From March 2008 thru September 2009, a total of 300,000
Malaysian migrated to other countries, among them 200,000 left
between Jan - Aug 2009. (in 8 months)
積下來，已經有超過200萬大馬人移民，接近今天印尼外勞在大馬的人口。
Cummulatively, there are 2 million Malaysian migrated, this
figure is close to the number of Indonesian workers in Malaysia
today.
不同的是，移居他國的大馬人，多是專業人士、中產階級。
The difference are, those migrated are mostly professional and
middle class people.
他們有很多出走的理由，追求事業發展，為了孩子前途，尋找個人更大空間……，概括一句：對馬來西亞失望。
They have many reasons to leave: pursue career development, for
the future of their children, in search of better life and
environment... In one sentence, they lost hope of Malaysia .
50年前，大家說，馬來西亞真好，好過香港，甚至日本。
50 years ago people said: Malaysia is very good, better than
Hong Kong and even Japan .
30年前，大家說，馬來西亞還不錯，比得上韓國、台灣（不提香港和日本了）。
30 years ago people said: Malaysia is not bad, comparable to S.
Korea and Taiwan . (No mention of Hong Kong and Japan any more).
20年前，大家說，馬來西亞還可以，至少超越中國、泰國（不能和台、韓比了）。
20 years ago people said: Malaysia can do la, at least better
than China and Thailand (Cannot compare with Taiwan and Korea lah)
10年前，大家說，馬來西亞再差，還不至於像越南、印尼（中國已是不同級別）。
10 years ago poeple said: No matter how bad Malaysia is, cannot
be worse than Vietnam and Indonesia ko-ah. ( China is already in
a different category).
今日，越南和印尼的經濟成長率遙遙領先大馬，社會活力和知識發展也勝過一籌；距離愈來愈近了。
Today, the economic growth rate of Vietnam and Indonesia already
far exceeded Malaysia , Social activity and intellectual
development of the country is also better, the gap between us
and them is closing up.
怕甚麼，還有菲律賓和柬埔寨、緬甸。
Why worry? there are still Philipines , Cambodia and Myanmar
behind us.
但是，一位經濟學家最近到菲律賓考察之後，認為再過20年，大馬可以取代菲律賓，出口馬籍女傭到全世界了。
However, according to an economist who recently surveyed
Phillipines, he think in 20 years' time, Malaysia can replace
Phillipines to become the World exporter of Malaysian maids.
半個世紀以來，馬來西亞是在大宅院裡，用封建方式，分配祖宗家業，消耗社會資源，浪費和逼走人才；不談競爭力，忽略生產力，討厭績效制。
Over half the century, Malaysians live in the big old imperial
housing complex, closed up and survive on properties left behind
by the ancestor; continue to consume up social resources,
wasteful, and drive away talents; they never talk about
competitiveness, totally neglect productivity, and hate meritocracy.
亞洲金融風暴來襲時，大馬把門關起來，以為避過一劫，有人還自我陶醉，自以為是天才策略。
When Asia economic storm hit in 1997, Malaysia closed their
doors, thinking we beautifully avoided a disaster, there even
think of themselves as genius, being able to handle the
situation so well.
然而，其它國家面對風暴，走出風暴，進行體質改革，跨步向前，登上另一個水平；大馬卻還在原地踏步。
However, just look at other countries in our neighbourhood, they
stand up, face the storm, and walk out of the storm. They
overhaul the system, improve the processes and march forward,
they moved up to a new level. And Malaysia , still walking on the spot.
馬來西亞，該醒一醒了。
Dear Malaysia , it's time to wake up! We are very very late now!
Sunday, January 24, 2010
FINANCE 101: Subprime Crisis - by Lin Peh, not suitable for those who can not take vulgar word
Subprime Crisis - Explained by Lin Peh Preface: Subprime Loan
In American, just like all the normal human being in the world, when they make any major purchases, they will always ask bank for loan. However, the sorhai american company always like to retrench people and thus the people there the income not very steady one. In Malaysia, when your income not steady you will loan money from AhLoong instead of BANK. But in america, their FBI very power so there is no Ahloong, instead their bank will loan money to all these not steady income people and this type of loan is called Subprime Loan.
Chapter One: How it started
About 10 years ago, all the commercial banks in American were promoting their loan with advertisement like
Since most Ang Mor are only "ada gaya" and "hao-lian" type of people, the bankers came out with special packages for these pokkai fellas. So, Ads like these were flying everywhere:
"No repayment for first 2 years"
"Want to be rich? Buy Property!"
"Money no enough? Borrow from me!"
"Zero down payment"
"Low rate guaranteed"
Wah! These packages are damn fierce wan! It basically tell people don't worry for the about repaying the loan because you may strike lottery before payment is due! In the event you don't strike lottery, you can still sell the house that you bought at higher price and pay everything and keep the gain!
Because of packages like this, many American (especially those who think if Black and become president of USA everything is possible) started to borrow money and buy house as INVESTMENT!
So, the banks business become very good, the accounts all look damn solid and all the bankers got huge bonus! But now.... got one problem... money all loan out but who can guarantee that these sorhais will be able to pay back when time comes?
Chapter Two: Investment Banks Also Want
After collecting his huge bonus, the CEOs of the commercial banks also need to do more creative works or else they will be fired soon. So, he went to see the bigger brother - Investment Bank!
For those of you who don't know, the Investment Bank in US is damn power wan! Their name also damn solid like Morgan Stanley, Lehman brothers, Goldman Sachs. The commercial bank CEOs objective is very simple, they want the Investment Bank to share share and join with them to play the game of Subprime Loan!
Even though the Investment Bank name power, their top management are also same like us eat full nothing to do one. So, they get all those economists, professors, even Nobel prize winners and together go to starbucks drink coffee and blow water.
After many rounds of talking cock, they concluded that these subprime loan is very risky but very exciting and profitable! Something like bank robbery! As a greedy bunch of motherfuckers working for greedy Investment Banks, they decided not to miss this great opportunity so, the Investment Banks are in!
Chapter Three: How The Investment Banks Play
Since Investment Banks are so power and big! They also decided to play it BIG! So, in order for them to raise all the fund to lend it out to those pokkai house owner, they issued something call CDO (Collateralized Debt Obligation). In line with the reputation of Investment Banks, the name CDO also power meaning no one understand! But Lin Peh tell you la, these CDO is actually something like Investment Banks borrow money from the some sorhais but the loan is guaranteed by those pokkai house owner's loan and their fucked up "very expensive" house. So, where to find such sorhai?
Chapter Four: Hedge Fund is the Real Sorhai?
In order to find the sorhais who are willing to put out such big sum of money for this type loan, the Investment Bankers did a lot of road show and even engage professionals to make their powerpoint presentation look solid.
After that, they invited groups and groups of sorhais to come listen to them talk cock, drink wine and see their powerpoint. When the powerpoint presentation said that the average return on CDO is approximately 12%, the saliva of the Hedge Fund managers started to drool, so they decided to put their money in and play the game also!
Before you jump into the conclusion that hedge fund are the sorhai, let's look at how the hedge fund got so much money....
The basic job function of hedge fund managers are killing each other at wall street without seeing any blood! They are the one who go around the world, screw peoples currency, stock markets, commodities so the CDO is only a small case la!
The hedge fund managers went around the world and look for low interest loan. For example, Japan interest rate has been very low since the day Karaoke machinese was invented. So, the hedge fund went to Japan and borrow at 1.5% which means, they just have to sign a few signatures, get the money from Japanese and then give to the investment banks and they can sit home masturbate and enjoy a net return of 10% without doing anything. With deal like that, the more they borrow, the more their return la! Do you still call them sorhai?
Chapter Five: Now, Everyone Can Be Rich!?
So, all the deals are now in place and the cash started to flow!
Strange thing does happen when you have such a huge system running - from the year 2001 to 2006, the real estate market in US was at a super boom ! Everyone was buying houses and make a lot of money! So, they were right about becoming a real estate tycoon without having to come out with a single cent ! So, from house owners to banks to investment banks to hedge fund all making money! Damn solid!
However, the investment bankers were not too happy when they see the hedge fund was making so much money from the CDO without having to do any donkey work. So, they got jealous and they themselves also invest in CDO! It is something like Ahloong themselves go borrow from another Ah Loong!
When that happened, the hedge fund managers see that the CDO was in such hot demand, they also became greedy and they pledge the CDO to banks so they can borrow more money to invest in more CDO and everyone just become richer and richer!
Chapter Six: Let's Insured Everything!
When the Investment Bankers see that the CDOs merry-go-round becoming so big round just like the Eye On Malaysia like that, they also got panic already. So, to play safe, they call the insurance company and tell the insurance company that they want to buy insurance for their CDOs!
Even though the insurance companies are generally greedy motherfuckers, they also not sorhai one. They study the track record of the CDOs and they charge the Investment Banks a heavy premium for it and give this type of policy an even more power name called Credit Default Swap (CDS)!
Since the hosuing market was ok, and everyone was still enjoying huge profit, the Insurance Companies too made very good money from these CDS in the last few years because they just sit there and collect premium without paying out anything!
That's WIN WIN SITUATION - just like what your teacher taught you in school!
Chapter Seven: Not The End Of Story
As usual, eveything that can generate income, people on the the wall street will create a unit trust fund for it. So, over the last few years, Many Unit Trust Fund that invest in CDS were created. However, in order to generate good sales for these Trust, these unit trusts must get good rating from the rating agency.
So, the people on wall street used their creativity to 100% and came out with a brand new idea - Assuming the companies already made $80 Billion in the CDS over the years, they will allocate a portion of it lets say $10 Billion to secured the Unit Trust Fund. Using the $10 Billion as 10% securities, the Fund will sell to the public $100 Billion of the Unit Trust.
That means, if the Fund lost money, the first 10% ($10 Billion) of the loses will be covered by the Insurance. But when it makes money, everything belongs to you! Good Deal or not? Therefore, the rating agency also give the fund AAA (highest) rating ! Since the deal is so good and with AAA rating somemore, everyone also bought! Old man bought! Young man bought! Pension fund bought! Education fund Bought! It was such good business, the Unit Trust decided to issue more Units to be sold! However, the problem is they never increase the $100 Billion securities! which also means the "reserve" for the losses has decrease from its original 10% to god knows what.
Chapter Eight: No Light At The End Of Tunnel
Just like Old chinese proverb said "Everything You Ate You Have To Vomit Out". The good time came to a stop by end of the year 2006 when the housing prices started to come down, people who bought houses found out there are no more buyers for the houses so they just defaulted on the loan and said F@*K IT !
The Bank try to lelong out those houses but could not find buyer. Citibank, Bank of America all reported huge loses. So, the bank all said F@&K IT!
Since Investment Banks has even bigger stake than the commercial banks in these loans, Morgan Stanley, Lehman Brothers all reported even bigger losses. So, the Investment Banks also said F#$K IT!
When the Hedge Fund saw all the other fellas all f@#%*d, they also cannot escape and Hedge Fund Stake is even bigger! So, Hedge Fund said F@%K IT!
And of course, all the AAA rating Unit Trusts F#@$&D!
Now, Pension Fund F@#*%D! Education Fund F@#*%D! The share market F@#*%D! USA F@#*%D! Europe F@#*%D! Japan F@#*%D! Australia F@#*%D! The Whole World F@#*%D! Bush F@#*%D! McCain F@#*%D! Obama F@#*%D!
In American, just like all the normal human being in the world, when they make any major purchases, they will always ask bank for loan. However, the sorhai american company always like to retrench people and thus the people there the income not very steady one. In Malaysia, when your income not steady you will loan money from AhLoong instead of BANK. But in america, their FBI very power so there is no Ahloong, instead their bank will loan money to all these not steady income people and this type of loan is called Subprime Loan.
Chapter One: How it started
About 10 years ago, all the commercial banks in American were promoting their loan with advertisement like
Since most Ang Mor are only "ada gaya" and "hao-lian" type of people, the bankers came out with special packages for these pokkai fellas. So, Ads like these were flying everywhere:
"No repayment for first 2 years"
"Want to be rich? Buy Property!"
"Money no enough? Borrow from me!"
"Zero down payment"
"Low rate guaranteed"
Wah! These packages are damn fierce wan! It basically tell people don't worry for the about repaying the loan because you may strike lottery before payment is due! In the event you don't strike lottery, you can still sell the house that you bought at higher price and pay everything and keep the gain!
Because of packages like this, many American (especially those who think if Black and become president of USA everything is possible) started to borrow money and buy house as INVESTMENT!
So, the banks business become very good, the accounts all look damn solid and all the bankers got huge bonus! But now.... got one problem... money all loan out but who can guarantee that these sorhais will be able to pay back when time comes?
Chapter Two: Investment Banks Also Want
After collecting his huge bonus, the CEOs of the commercial banks also need to do more creative works or else they will be fired soon. So, he went to see the bigger brother - Investment Bank!
For those of you who don't know, the Investment Bank in US is damn power wan! Their name also damn solid like Morgan Stanley, Lehman brothers, Goldman Sachs. The commercial bank CEOs objective is very simple, they want the Investment Bank to share share and join with them to play the game of Subprime Loan!
Even though the Investment Bank name power, their top management are also same like us eat full nothing to do one. So, they get all those economists, professors, even Nobel prize winners and together go to starbucks drink coffee and blow water.
After many rounds of talking cock, they concluded that these subprime loan is very risky but very exciting and profitable! Something like bank robbery! As a greedy bunch of motherfuckers working for greedy Investment Banks, they decided not to miss this great opportunity so, the Investment Banks are in!
Chapter Three: How The Investment Banks Play
Since Investment Banks are so power and big! They also decided to play it BIG! So, in order for them to raise all the fund to lend it out to those pokkai house owner, they issued something call CDO (Collateralized Debt Obligation). In line with the reputation of Investment Banks, the name CDO also power meaning no one understand! But Lin Peh tell you la, these CDO is actually something like Investment Banks borrow money from the some sorhais but the loan is guaranteed by those pokkai house owner's loan and their fucked up "very expensive" house. So, where to find such sorhai?
Chapter Four: Hedge Fund is the Real Sorhai?
In order to find the sorhais who are willing to put out such big sum of money for this type loan, the Investment Bankers did a lot of road show and even engage professionals to make their powerpoint presentation look solid.
After that, they invited groups and groups of sorhais to come listen to them talk cock, drink wine and see their powerpoint. When the powerpoint presentation said that the average return on CDO is approximately 12%, the saliva of the Hedge Fund managers started to drool, so they decided to put their money in and play the game also!
Before you jump into the conclusion that hedge fund are the sorhai, let's look at how the hedge fund got so much money....
The basic job function of hedge fund managers are killing each other at wall street without seeing any blood! They are the one who go around the world, screw peoples currency, stock markets, commodities so the CDO is only a small case la!
The hedge fund managers went around the world and look for low interest loan. For example, Japan interest rate has been very low since the day Karaoke machinese was invented. So, the hedge fund went to Japan and borrow at 1.5% which means, they just have to sign a few signatures, get the money from Japanese and then give to the investment banks and they can sit home masturbate and enjoy a net return of 10% without doing anything. With deal like that, the more they borrow, the more their return la! Do you still call them sorhai?
Chapter Five: Now, Everyone Can Be Rich!?
So, all the deals are now in place and the cash started to flow!
Strange thing does happen when you have such a huge system running - from the year 2001 to 2006, the real estate market in US was at a super boom ! Everyone was buying houses and make a lot of money! So, they were right about becoming a real estate tycoon without having to come out with a single cent ! So, from house owners to banks to investment banks to hedge fund all making money! Damn solid!
However, the investment bankers were not too happy when they see the hedge fund was making so much money from the CDO without having to do any donkey work. So, they got jealous and they themselves also invest in CDO! It is something like Ahloong themselves go borrow from another Ah Loong!
When that happened, the hedge fund managers see that the CDO was in such hot demand, they also became greedy and they pledge the CDO to banks so they can borrow more money to invest in more CDO and everyone just become richer and richer!
Chapter Six: Let's Insured Everything!
When the Investment Bankers see that the CDOs merry-go-round becoming so big round just like the Eye On Malaysia like that, they also got panic already. So, to play safe, they call the insurance company and tell the insurance company that they want to buy insurance for their CDOs!
Even though the insurance companies are generally greedy motherfuckers, they also not sorhai one. They study the track record of the CDOs and they charge the Investment Banks a heavy premium for it and give this type of policy an even more power name called Credit Default Swap (CDS)!
Since the hosuing market was ok, and everyone was still enjoying huge profit, the Insurance Companies too made very good money from these CDS in the last few years because they just sit there and collect premium without paying out anything!
That's WIN WIN SITUATION - just like what your teacher taught you in school!
Chapter Seven: Not The End Of Story
As usual, eveything that can generate income, people on the the wall street will create a unit trust fund for it. So, over the last few years, Many Unit Trust Fund that invest in CDS were created. However, in order to generate good sales for these Trust, these unit trusts must get good rating from the rating agency.
So, the people on wall street used their creativity to 100% and came out with a brand new idea - Assuming the companies already made $80 Billion in the CDS over the years, they will allocate a portion of it lets say $10 Billion to secured the Unit Trust Fund. Using the $10 Billion as 10% securities, the Fund will sell to the public $100 Billion of the Unit Trust.
That means, if the Fund lost money, the first 10% ($10 Billion) of the loses will be covered by the Insurance. But when it makes money, everything belongs to you! Good Deal or not? Therefore, the rating agency also give the fund AAA (highest) rating ! Since the deal is so good and with AAA rating somemore, everyone also bought! Old man bought! Young man bought! Pension fund bought! Education fund Bought! It was such good business, the Unit Trust decided to issue more Units to be sold! However, the problem is they never increase the $100 Billion securities! which also means the "reserve" for the losses has decrease from its original 10% to god knows what.
Chapter Eight: No Light At The End Of Tunnel
Just like Old chinese proverb said "Everything You Ate You Have To Vomit Out". The good time came to a stop by end of the year 2006 when the housing prices started to come down, people who bought houses found out there are no more buyers for the houses so they just defaulted on the loan and said F@*K IT !
The Bank try to lelong out those houses but could not find buyer. Citibank, Bank of America all reported huge loses. So, the bank all said F@&K IT!
Since Investment Banks has even bigger stake than the commercial banks in these loans, Morgan Stanley, Lehman Brothers all reported even bigger losses. So, the Investment Banks also said F#$K IT!
When the Hedge Fund saw all the other fellas all f@#%*d, they also cannot escape and Hedge Fund Stake is even bigger! So, Hedge Fund said F@%K IT!
And of course, all the AAA rating Unit Trusts F#@$&D!
Now, Pension Fund F@#*%D! Education Fund F@#*%D! The share market F@#*%D! USA F@#*%D! Europe F@#*%D! Japan F@#*%D! Australia F@#*%D! The Whole World F@#*%D! Bush F@#*%D! McCain F@#*%D! Obama F@#*%D!
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Another Unknown Side for Onion Usage
目前甲流在世界各地肆虐，美國已經宣佈進入緊急狀態，加拿大在全國免費注射疫苗，中國也有5萬多人感染了病毒。上周我有兩個午餐會不得不取消，本周也是難以確定好幾個午餐會是否要舉行，因為很多人生病（不一定是甲流）。這次的流感的確給人們的生活帶來很多麻煩和困擾。一個加拿大朋友把下面這封郵件發給我和一些朋友。我把它翻譯出來送給大家，希望對你有所幫助，希望大家健康平安不要生病。其中的一些東西與中醫和華人飲食有關聯。
In 1919. When the flu killed 40 million people, there was this doctor that visited the many farmers to see if he could help them combat the flu. Many of the farmers and their family had contracted it, and many died.
1919年。當流感造成了四千萬人死亡時，有一位醫生到各地農場去探視，看是否可以幫助人們戰勝流感。很多農民和他們家庭感染了流感，很多人因此而死亡。
The doctor came upon this one farmer, and to his surprise, everyone was very healthy.
這位醫生來到一家人家。出乎預料，這家的每一個人都非常健康。
When the doctor asked what the farmer was doing that was different, the wife replied that she had placed an unpeeled onion in a dish in the rooms of the home (probably only two rooms back then).
醫生詢問這家的做法與其他人家有何不同，這家的妻子說她在家裏的每一個房間（那時大概也就是兩間吧）裏放置了一顆沒有剝皮的洋蔥。
The doctor couldn't believe it, and asked if he could have one of the onions, and place it under the microscope.
醫生無法置信，因此就問是否可以要一顆洋蔥以便放在顯微鏡下觀察觀察。
She gave him one, and when he did this, he did find the flu virus in the onion.
她給了他一顆。醫生觀察時真的在洋蔥上發現了流感病菌。
It obviously absorbed the bacteria, therefore keeping the family healthy. 顯然，洋蔥吸收了病菌，因此讓這家人保持健康。Now, I heard this story from my hairdresser in Arizona.
如今，我從亞利桑那州我的理髮師那裏聽到類似的故事。
She said that several years ago, many of her employees were coming down with the flu, and so were many of her customers.
她說幾年前她的很多雇員感染流感，她的很多顧客也是如此。
The next year, she placed several bowls with onions around in her shop. To her surprise, none of her staff got sick. It must work . . .
次年，她在她的理髮店裏放了幾個果盤，裏面放了一些洋蔥。令她吃驚的是，她的員工沒有一個生病的。看來洋蔥真的起作用…
(And no, she is not in the onion business.)
（真的，她並不做洋蔥的生意。）The moral of the story is, buy some onions and place them in bowls around your home.
故事的核心是，買一些洋蔥吧，把它們擺放在你的家裏的果盤裏。
If you work at a desk, place one or two in your office, or under your desk, or even on top somewhere.
如果你是坐辦公室的，在你的辦公室裏，或者辦公桌下面，或者在櫃子頂部放置幾顆洋蔥吧。
Try it and see what happens.
試試看效果怎麼樣。We did it last year, and we never got the flu.
我們去年做了，沒有人得流感。If this helps you and your loved ones from getting sick, all the better.
如果這樣做可以幫助你和你所愛的人不感冒，那就太好了。
If you do get the flu, it just might be a mild case.
如果你仍然得了感冒，也許會是比較輕微的症狀。Whatever, what have you to lose?
不管結果如何，你又會有什麼損失呢？
Just a few bucks on onions!
除了幾顆洋蔥之外！
Now there is a P. S. to this for I sent it to a friend in Oregon who regularly contributes material to me on health issues.
下面是後續。我把這個送給我在奧爾良的朋友，她經常給我一些健康方面的建議。
She replied with this most interesting experience about onions:
她回復說了關於洋蔥的最有趣的實驗：I don't know about the farmer’s story, but I do know that I contracted pneumonia, and needless to say I was very ill.
我不知道那個農民的故事，但是我知道我得了肺炎。無需說，我病的不輕。
I came across an article that said to cut both ends off an onion, put one end on a fork, and then place the forked end into an empty jar, placing the jar next to the sick patient at night.
我讀到一篇文章，建議把洋蔥的兩頭切掉，插在叉子上，然後把叉子放在花瓶裏，晚上放在病人身旁。
It said the onion would be black in the morning from the germs.
據說，洋蔥會因為病菌而在次日清晨變黑。
Sure enough, it happened just like that.
果然，事情跟說的完全一樣。
The onion was a mess, and I began to feel better.
洋蔥看起來糟透了，但我卻開始好起來。Another thing I read in the article was that onions and garlic placed around the room saved many from the black plague years ago.
那篇文章還談到放在屋子裏的洋蔥和大蒜在多年前的黑死病中救了很多人的命。
They have powerful antibacterial, antiseptic properties.
In 1919. When the flu killed 40 million people, there was this doctor that visited the many farmers to see if he could help them combat the flu. Many of the farmers and their family had contracted it, and many died.
1919年。當流感造成了四千萬人死亡時，有一位醫生到各地農場去探視，看是否可以幫助人們戰勝流感。很多農民和他們家庭感染了流感，很多人因此而死亡。
The doctor came upon this one farmer, and to his surprise, everyone was very healthy.
這位醫生來到一家人家。出乎預料，這家的每一個人都非常健康。
When the doctor asked what the farmer was doing that was different, the wife replied that she had placed an unpeeled onion in a dish in the rooms of the home (probably only two rooms back then).
醫生詢問這家的做法與其他人家有何不同，這家的妻子說她在家裏的每一個房間（那時大概也就是兩間吧）裏放置了一顆沒有剝皮的洋蔥。
The doctor couldn't believe it, and asked if he could have one of the onions, and place it under the microscope.
醫生無法置信，因此就問是否可以要一顆洋蔥以便放在顯微鏡下觀察觀察。
She gave him one, and when he did this, he did find the flu virus in the onion.
她給了他一顆。醫生觀察時真的在洋蔥上發現了流感病菌。
It obviously absorbed the bacteria, therefore keeping the family healthy. 顯然，洋蔥吸收了病菌，因此讓這家人保持健康。Now, I heard this story from my hairdresser in Arizona.
如今，我從亞利桑那州我的理髮師那裏聽到類似的故事。
She said that several years ago, many of her employees were coming down with the flu, and so were many of her customers.
她說幾年前她的很多雇員感染流感，她的很多顧客也是如此。
The next year, she placed several bowls with onions around in her shop. To her surprise, none of her staff got sick. It must work . . .
次年，她在她的理髮店裏放了幾個果盤，裏面放了一些洋蔥。令她吃驚的是，她的員工沒有一個生病的。看來洋蔥真的起作用…
(And no, she is not in the onion business.)
（真的，她並不做洋蔥的生意。）The moral of the story is, buy some onions and place them in bowls around your home.
故事的核心是，買一些洋蔥吧，把它們擺放在你的家裏的果盤裏。
If you work at a desk, place one or two in your office, or under your desk, or even on top somewhere.
如果你是坐辦公室的，在你的辦公室裏，或者辦公桌下面，或者在櫃子頂部放置幾顆洋蔥吧。
Try it and see what happens.
試試看效果怎麼樣。We did it last year, and we never got the flu.
我們去年做了，沒有人得流感。If this helps you and your loved ones from getting sick, all the better.
如果這樣做可以幫助你和你所愛的人不感冒，那就太好了。
If you do get the flu, it just might be a mild case.
如果你仍然得了感冒，也許會是比較輕微的症狀。Whatever, what have you to lose?
不管結果如何，你又會有什麼損失呢？
Just a few bucks on onions!
除了幾顆洋蔥之外！
Now there is a P. S. to this for I sent it to a friend in Oregon who regularly contributes material to me on health issues.
下面是後續。我把這個送給我在奧爾良的朋友，她經常給我一些健康方面的建議。
She replied with this most interesting experience about onions:
她回復說了關於洋蔥的最有趣的實驗：I don't know about the farmer’s story, but I do know that I contracted pneumonia, and needless to say I was very ill.
我不知道那個農民的故事，但是我知道我得了肺炎。無需說，我病的不輕。
I came across an article that said to cut both ends off an onion, put one end on a fork, and then place the forked end into an empty jar, placing the jar next to the sick patient at night.
我讀到一篇文章，建議把洋蔥的兩頭切掉，插在叉子上，然後把叉子放在花瓶裏，晚上放在病人身旁。
It said the onion would be black in the morning from the germs.
據說，洋蔥會因為病菌而在次日清晨變黑。
Sure enough, it happened just like that.
果然，事情跟說的完全一樣。
The onion was a mess, and I began to feel better.
洋蔥看起來糟透了，但我卻開始好起來。Another thing I read in the article was that onions and garlic placed around the room saved many from the black plague years ago.
那篇文章還談到放在屋子裏的洋蔥和大蒜在多年前的黑死病中救了很多人的命。
They have powerful antibacterial, antiseptic properties.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
離婚酒店
他和她結婚整整10年了，夫妻間已經沒有任何衝動與情趣，
他越來越覺得自己對她幾乎就是一種程式與義務，
他開始厭煩起了她，尤其是單位新調進了一個年輕活潑的女孩，
對他發起了瘋狂的進攻，他突然覺得她是自己的第二春，經過再三考慮，
他決定和她離婚。她似乎也麻木了，很平靜地答應了他，
兩個人一起走進了民政部門。 ¬
手續辦得很順利，出門後，兩個人已經是各自獨立的自由人了，
不知為什麼，他心裏突然有種空落落的感覺，他看了看她：
“天已經晚了，一起去吃點飯吧。”
她看了看他：“好吧，聽說新開了一家‘離婚酒店’，
專門執行離婚夫婦的最後一頓晚餐，要不咱們到那兒去看看。” ¬
他點了點頭，兩人一前一後默默地走進了離婚酒店。 ¬
“先生女士晚上好。”二人在包廂剛坐下，服務小姐便走了進來，
“請問兩位想吃點兒什麼？” ¬
他看了看她：“你點吧。” ¬
她搖了搖頭：“我不常出來，不太清楚這些，還是你點吧。” ¬
“對不起先生女士，我們離婚酒店有個規矩，這頓飯必
須要由 女士點先生平時最愛吃的菜，由先生點女士平時最愛吃的菜，
這叫‘最後的記憶’。” ¬
“那好吧，”她理了理頭髮，“清蒸魚、溜蘑菇、拌木耳，
記住，都不要放蔥薑蒜，我先生……這位先生他不吃這些。” ¬
“先生呢？”服務小姐看了看他。
他愣住了。結婚10年，他真的不知道老婆喜歡吃什麼。他張著嘴，
尷尬地愣在了那兒。
“就這些吧，其實這是我們兩個人都愛吃的。”她連忙打起了圓場。 ¬
服務小姐笑了笑：“說實話，到我們離婚酒店來吃這最後一頓晚餐，
所有的先生和女士其實都吃不下去什麼，所以這‘最後的記憶’
咱們還是不要吃了吧。就喝我們酒店特意為所有離婚人士準備的
晚餐——冷飲吧，這也是所有來的人都不拒絕的選擇。”
她與她都點了點頭：“那就來冷飲吧。” ¬
很快，服務小姐送來了兩份冷飲，兩份飲料中一份淡藍一片，
全是冰渣；一份滿杯紅潤，冒著熱氣。 ¬
“這份晚餐名叫‘一半是火焰，一半是海水’，兩位慢用。”
服務小姐介紹完退了下去。 ¬
包房裏靜悄悄的，兩個人相對而坐，一時竟不知道該說什麼好。 ¬
“篤篤篤！”輕輕一陣敲門聲，服務小姐走了近來，托盤裏托著
一枝鮮豔的紅玫瑰：“先生，還記得您第一次給這位女士送花的情景嗎？
現在一切都結束了，夫妻不成就當朋友，朋友要好聚好散，
最後為女士送朵玫瑰吧。” ¬
她渾身一抖，眼前又浮現出了10年前他給她送花的情景，那時，
他們剛剛來到這座舉目無親的省城，什麼都沒有，一切從零開始。
白天，他們四處找工作，
努力拼搏；晚上， 為了增加收入，她去晚市出小攤，他去給人家刷盤子。很晚很晚，
他們才一起回到租住在地下室裏那不足10平米的小屋。日子很苦，可他們卻很幸福。
到省城的第一個情人節
那天，他為自己買了第一朵紅玫瑰，她幸福得流下了眼淚。
10年了，一切都好起來了，可兩個人卻走向了分離。她想著想著，淚水盈滿了雙眼，
她擺了擺手說：“不用了。” ¬
他也想起了過去的10年，他這才記起，自己已經有五六年沒有給
她買過一枝玫瑰了。他擺了擺手：“不，要買。” ¬
服務小姐卻拿起了玫瑰，“刷刷”兩下撕成了兩半，分別扔進了
兩個人的飲料杯裏，玫瑰竟然溶解在了飲料裏。 ¬
“這是我們酒店特意用糯米製成的紅玫瑰，也是送給你們的第三道菜，
名叫‘映景的美麗’。先生女士慢用，有什麼需要直接叫我。”
服務小姐說完，轉身走了出去。 ¬
“XX，我……”他一把握住她的手，有些說不出話來。 ¬
她抽了抽手，沒有抽動，便不再動彈。兩個人靜靜地對視著，什麼也說不出來。
“啪！”突然，燈熄了，整個包房裏漆黑一片，外面警鈴大作，
一股煙味兒飄了進來。 ¬
“怎麼了？”兩個人急忙站了起來。 ¬
“店起火了，大家馬上從安全通道走！快！”外面，有人聲嘶力竭地喊了起來。
“老公！”她一下撲進了他的懷裏，“我怕！” ¬
“別怕！”他緊緊摟住她，“親愛的，有我呢。走，往外衝！” ¬
包廂外面燈光通明，秩序井然，什麼都沒有發生。 ¬
服務小姐走了過來：“對不起，先生女士，讓兩位受驚了。
酒店並沒有失火，煙味兒也是特意往包房裏放的一點點，
這是我們的第四道菜，名叫‘內心的選擇’。請回包廂。” ¬
他和她回到了包廂，燈光依舊。他一把拉她：“親愛的，
服務小姐說得對，剛才那才是你我內心真正的選擇。其實，
我們誰都離不開誰，明天咱們重新結婚吧？”
她咬了咬嘴唇：“你願意嗎？” ¬
“我願意，我現在什麼都明白了，明天一早咱就去辦結婚。
小姐，買單。”他說著喊了起來 。 ¬
服務小姐走了近來，遞給兩人一人一張精緻的紅色清單：
“先生女士好，這是兩位的帳單，也是本酒店的最後一道贈品，
名叫‘永遠的帳單’，請兩位永遠保存吧。"
¬
他看著帳單，眼淚淌了下來。 ¬
“你怎麼了？”她連忙問道。 ¬
他把帳單遞給了她：“親愛的，我錯了，我對不起你。” ¬
她打開帳單一看，只見上面寫著：
一個溫暖的家；
兩隻操勞的手；
三更不熄等您歸家的燈；
四季注意身體的叮囑；
無微不至的關懷；
六旬婆母的微笑；
起早貪黑對孩子的照顧；
八方維護您的威信；
九下廚房為了您愛吃的一道菜；
十年為您逝去的青春……
這就是您的妻子。 ¬
“老公，您辛苦了，這些年也是我冷漠了你。”
她也把自己的那份帳單遞給了他。他打開帳單，只見上面寫著：
一個男人的責任；
兩肩挑起的重擔；
三更半夜的勞累；
四處奔波的匆忙；
無法傾訴的委屈；
留在臉上的滄桑；
七姑八姨的義務；
八上八下的波折；
九優一疵的凡人；
時時對家對子的真情……
這就是您的丈夫。 ¬
兩個人抱在一起，放聲痛哭。 ¬
結完帳，他和她對經理千恩萬謝，手牽手走回了家。
看者他們幸福的背影，經理微笑著點了點頭：
“真幸福，我們離婚酒店又挽救了一個家！
他越來越覺得自己對她幾乎就是一種程式與義務，
他開始厭煩起了她，尤其是單位新調進了一個年輕活潑的女孩，
對他發起了瘋狂的進攻，他突然覺得她是自己的第二春，經過再三考慮，
他決定和她離婚。她似乎也麻木了，很平靜地答應了他，
兩個人一起走進了民政部門。 ¬
手續辦得很順利，出門後，兩個人已經是各自獨立的自由人了，
不知為什麼，他心裏突然有種空落落的感覺，他看了看她：
“天已經晚了，一起去吃點飯吧。”
她看了看他：“好吧，聽說新開了一家‘離婚酒店’，
專門執行離婚夫婦的最後一頓晚餐，要不咱們到那兒去看看。” ¬
他點了點頭，兩人一前一後默默地走進了離婚酒店。 ¬
“先生女士晚上好。”二人在包廂剛坐下，服務小姐便走了進來，
“請問兩位想吃點兒什麼？” ¬
他看了看她：“你點吧。” ¬
她搖了搖頭：“我不常出來，不太清楚這些，還是你點吧。” ¬
“對不起先生女士，我們離婚酒店有個規矩，這頓飯必
須要由 女士點先生平時最愛吃的菜，由先生點女士平時最愛吃的菜，
這叫‘最後的記憶’。” ¬
“那好吧，”她理了理頭髮，“清蒸魚、溜蘑菇、拌木耳，
記住，都不要放蔥薑蒜，我先生……這位先生他不吃這些。” ¬
“先生呢？”服務小姐看了看他。
他愣住了。結婚10年，他真的不知道老婆喜歡吃什麼。他張著嘴，
尷尬地愣在了那兒。
“就這些吧，其實這是我們兩個人都愛吃的。”她連忙打起了圓場。 ¬
服務小姐笑了笑：“說實話，到我們離婚酒店來吃這最後一頓晚餐，
所有的先生和女士其實都吃不下去什麼，所以這‘最後的記憶’
咱們還是不要吃了吧。就喝我們酒店特意為所有離婚人士準備的
晚餐——冷飲吧，這也是所有來的人都不拒絕的選擇。”
她與她都點了點頭：“那就來冷飲吧。” ¬
很快，服務小姐送來了兩份冷飲，兩份飲料中一份淡藍一片，
全是冰渣；一份滿杯紅潤，冒著熱氣。 ¬
“這份晚餐名叫‘一半是火焰，一半是海水’，兩位慢用。”
服務小姐介紹完退了下去。 ¬
包房裏靜悄悄的，兩個人相對而坐，一時竟不知道該說什麼好。 ¬
“篤篤篤！”輕輕一陣敲門聲，服務小姐走了近來，托盤裏托著
一枝鮮豔的紅玫瑰：“先生，還記得您第一次給這位女士送花的情景嗎？
現在一切都結束了，夫妻不成就當朋友，朋友要好聚好散，
最後為女士送朵玫瑰吧。” ¬
她渾身一抖，眼前又浮現出了10年前他給她送花的情景，那時，
他們剛剛來到這座舉目無親的省城，什麼都沒有，一切從零開始。
白天，他們四處找工作，
努力拼搏；晚上， 為了增加收入，她去晚市出小攤，他去給人家刷盤子。很晚很晚，
他們才一起回到租住在地下室裏那不足10平米的小屋。日子很苦，可他們卻很幸福。
到省城的第一個情人節
那天，他為自己買了第一朵紅玫瑰，她幸福得流下了眼淚。
10年了，一切都好起來了，可兩個人卻走向了分離。她想著想著，淚水盈滿了雙眼，
她擺了擺手說：“不用了。” ¬
他也想起了過去的10年，他這才記起，自己已經有五六年沒有給
她買過一枝玫瑰了。他擺了擺手：“不，要買。” ¬
服務小姐卻拿起了玫瑰，“刷刷”兩下撕成了兩半，分別扔進了
兩個人的飲料杯裏，玫瑰竟然溶解在了飲料裏。 ¬
“這是我們酒店特意用糯米製成的紅玫瑰，也是送給你們的第三道菜，
名叫‘映景的美麗’。先生女士慢用，有什麼需要直接叫我。”
服務小姐說完，轉身走了出去。 ¬
“XX，我……”他一把握住她的手，有些說不出話來。 ¬
她抽了抽手，沒有抽動，便不再動彈。兩個人靜靜地對視著，什麼也說不出來。
“啪！”突然，燈熄了，整個包房裏漆黑一片，外面警鈴大作，
一股煙味兒飄了進來。 ¬
“怎麼了？”兩個人急忙站了起來。 ¬
“店起火了，大家馬上從安全通道走！快！”外面，有人聲嘶力竭地喊了起來。
“老公！”她一下撲進了他的懷裏，“我怕！” ¬
“別怕！”他緊緊摟住她，“親愛的，有我呢。走，往外衝！” ¬
包廂外面燈光通明，秩序井然，什麼都沒有發生。 ¬
服務小姐走了過來：“對不起，先生女士，讓兩位受驚了。
酒店並沒有失火，煙味兒也是特意往包房裏放的一點點，
這是我們的第四道菜，名叫‘內心的選擇’。請回包廂。” ¬
他和她回到了包廂，燈光依舊。他一把拉她：“親愛的，
服務小姐說得對，剛才那才是你我內心真正的選擇。其實，
我們誰都離不開誰，明天咱們重新結婚吧？”
她咬了咬嘴唇：“你願意嗎？” ¬
“我願意，我現在什麼都明白了，明天一早咱就去辦結婚。
小姐，買單。”他說著喊了起來 。 ¬
服務小姐走了近來，遞給兩人一人一張精緻的紅色清單：
“先生女士好，這是兩位的帳單，也是本酒店的最後一道贈品，
名叫‘永遠的帳單’，請兩位永遠保存吧。"
¬
他看著帳單，眼淚淌了下來。 ¬
“你怎麼了？”她連忙問道。 ¬
他把帳單遞給了她：“親愛的，我錯了，我對不起你。” ¬
她打開帳單一看，只見上面寫著：
一個溫暖的家；
兩隻操勞的手；
三更不熄等您歸家的燈；
四季注意身體的叮囑；
無微不至的關懷；
六旬婆母的微笑；
起早貪黑對孩子的照顧；
八方維護您的威信；
九下廚房為了您愛吃的一道菜；
十年為您逝去的青春……
這就是您的妻子。 ¬
“老公，您辛苦了，這些年也是我冷漠了你。”
她也把自己的那份帳單遞給了他。他打開帳單，只見上面寫著：
一個男人的責任；
兩肩挑起的重擔；
三更半夜的勞累；
四處奔波的匆忙；
無法傾訴的委屈；
留在臉上的滄桑；
七姑八姨的義務；
八上八下的波折；
九優一疵的凡人；
時時對家對子的真情……
這就是您的丈夫。 ¬
兩個人抱在一起，放聲痛哭。 ¬
結完帳，他和她對經理千恩萬謝，手牽手走回了家。
看者他們幸福的背影，經理微笑著點了點頭：
“真幸福，我們離婚酒店又挽救了一個家！
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